A recovery plan is a pre-determined way of expressing our sexuality consistent with our values, so that even when confused, we have a written guideline to help us. In defining our own sobriety, we make a list of all of our acting out behaviors. Making this list is very specific and is followed by a solemn commitment to yourself not to engage in those behaviors. We choose, one day and one situation at a time, not to engage in those behaviors.
- Set your bottom lines;
- Discuss your bottom lines (with some one you trust);
- Know your bottom lines;
- Observe your bottom lines.
- Read over your sexual recovery plan frequently.
Remembering our goals helps us lose the craving to go back to the anguish and confusion we are beginning to ease out of. Most recovery plans include personal boundaries in addition to bottom lines from which we completely abstain. Boundaries are the “slippery” slopes that can became blurred or even non-existent when we were in our sexual addiction. Part of recovery is identifying appropriate boundaries or limits with respect to people, places and activities. For example, we might choose to set a boundary regarding keeping company with people who continue in their addictions. This is self-protective and healthy. When we were in our addiction there was nothing we would not do and nothing we felt we could not or should not do. Now, in recovery, we must set boundaries to keep ourselves healthy and safe. There is no right or wrong way to write a recovery plan for yourself.